They say it takes a village to raise a child and let me tell you I do not disagree. Living in a country town some distance from family, my husband and I relied on our ‘village’ each and every day. So the question for us was, who do we have in our village? What experiences do we want for our children? What values do our villagers hold?
Stephen Covey would tell us to ‘begin with the end in mind.’ With that thought, what are the attributes we wish our children to have once they leave our ‘village’?
Many years ago, my husband and I started several family traditions. One was our Family Mission Statement. Every year in January we would plan as a family how we would live out this mission in the coming 12 months, notwithstanding events out of our control. For us it was truly about behaviours, values and experiences, commitments and traditions.
We sought villagers who could provide our family with not only support but challenge, people who enabled us all to be better versions of ourselves, not just more of the same. These villagers came in the form of daycare mums, coaches, teachers, pastors, music tutors, neighbours, extended family, friends and employers. These remarkable individuals (you know who you are), helped shape our children into who they are today.
When each of our children turned 18, there was no huge ‘coming of age’ party. Instead, an intimate dinner with our village. Each of our children would choose who they wanted to invite for dinner, knowing they would have the responsibility to share with each of these people how they had helped shape them to be the adult they had become. In turn, each guest would tell our child how they felt they impacted them. In so many ways, it was the culmination of a ‘job well done’. With each story my husband and I were more and more amazed at the profound impact of our village.
So, I ask you? What are the attributes your village brings to your child? How is this village equipping them for a future unknown? How is your village preparing your child for all that life has in store? How does your village prepare your child to work with those of differing viewpoints? How does your village help to build empathy, compassion, tolerance, resilience, strength, patience and wisdom in your child?
How does your village ensure your child ventures into the world knowing they not only have rights but a set of responsibilities as well?
Find your village!
Choose wisely as the impacts are lasting.
