Two of the biggest worries I hear from teachers about Affective Statements are as understandable as they are, frankly, missing the point.
First, the negative ones. “I’m disappointed to hear you speak like that.” Teachers worry that saying this might make a student feel shame. Well… yes. That’s kind of the idea. We should feel a bit awful when we miss the mark. That discomfort is the human mechanism that points us back to responsibility.
The key, for determined and restorative teachers, is not about leaving them stuck in the ‘awful’. It’s about creating an environment where they can resolve it – through an authentic apology, a change in behaviour and act of remorse. Without that chance, it’s just painting a student with inescapable guilt. With it, it’s growth. It’s worth asking ourselves: are we offering students that next step, or just dropping the mic at, “I’m disappointed”?
Then there’s the pushback on positive Affective Statements. “I’m delighted to see you start your task so promptly.” I often get asked, “Should kids really need this validation?” Here’s the thing: it’s not validation. It’s information. Affective Statements aren’t ego boosts. They’re feedback about how personal choices ripple outward.
And in the end, that’s the goal: to inform. To make the invisible impact of our actions visible. Because with enough information, students can make better choices for themselves.
A classroom where students relentlessly make smarter, kinder and more productive choices? That’s a workplace I’d show up for every day.
Keep fighting that good fight,
P.S. I’ll be presenting at the National Education Summit, Melbourne in August. If you’re thinking of joining me (and a brilliant line-up of speakers), make sure to use my VIP code: VIP2025M when registering to receive 15% off your ticket. Register here – and make sure you come and say hi!
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