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How many times?

My three young adults have become amazing young people, people I am proud of, every day. They are making good choices, starting careers and finishing off their studies. They are, you might say, kicking goals. They listen to advice, have complex conversations and then make their own decision to allow them to move forward. It wasn’t always this way.

When they were younger…oh my goodness! The madness. The crazy. The tension as they all stormed around trying to assert their personalities, to find their sense of self. To become. It was no walk in the park, and not only were we not kicking goals, but we also couldn’t have found the ball if we had tried. At times, it was a shocker!

I often used to ask myself, how many times? How many times do I need to ask them to get ready for school? To brush their teeth? To pick their crap up off the floor? To not hit each other? To get along? To study? To put their clothes in the basket as opposed to next to the basket? The list went on and on. How many times? For real?

The answer was as many times as I needed to. These were my people, my babes, the loves of my life, and the truth is I asked a million times, and I’d have asked a million more if it meant that they could make better choices. As parents, as mind-numbing and infuriating as it might be, we continue to ask, to remind, to suggest because we want our kids to succeed and be good people. We want them to find happiness, love and success, so we don’t give up. Not ever. As their parent, I am their person in the world, the one they can trust and rely on – even when that sometimes drove me mad!

For some of our kids in schools, we are their safe place. You, their teacher, might be the only person in the world whom they feel gets them. You may be their person, and so for that reason, the answer to “How many times?” is s million, and then a million more. Yes, it can be frustrating and many days feel like groundhog day for sure, but they need you to keep going. They need you to keep going when all they seem to be doing is screwing up. They need you to smile and reassure and ask, for the millionth time, for them to do something.

We all want our young people to be good people, to find success, love and happiness and so how many times do we need to repeat and ask the same questions? A million. And then a million more.

Thank you teachers, staff and leaders, for never stopping, never giving up!

Check out other articles Cassie has written here.