We teachers all want the same thing for our students. We want them to grow into fantastic humans: empathetic, collaborative, principled and able to hold their own in conversation. We want them to know how to share ideas confidently, to respectfully disagree, and to contribute something meaningful to the communities around them.
But in classrooms everywhere, teachers are telling me a similar story. Students who find it hard to work with anyone outside their friendship group. Students reluctant to speak up in front of others. Group discussions that barely get past a first hesitant comment from one brave soul.
Sometimes it can feel like pulling teeth to get students to really talk to each other.
Why is it so hard? There are probably plenty of reasons: social and peer pressures, Covid 19, lack of confidence, the ever-present mobile phone and TikTok bombardment. But part of it I reckon is simply this; many kids just haven’t had that much practice.
And here’s the part that may be a little uncomfortable. We teachers might be unintentionally adding to the problem.
Think about the way most classroom conversations work. The teacher asks the question, the student answers to the teacher, and the teacher confirms whether it’s ‘right’ or ‘close enough.’ It’s most often the teacher at the centre. Over time, students learn that if they want to contribute, they don’t talk to each other. They talk through us.
So when we ask them to suddenly debate an issue, collaborate on a group project, or build something new together, it’s no wonder they struggle. We’ve accidentally made ourselves the gatekeepers of their communication.
The good news is we don’t have to stay in this role. Small shifts in how we prime and respond can start making room for students to connect with each other, not just with us.
What can we do?
- Talk about it with them. Let students know why you’re making changes: “I want you to practise talking with each other, not just with me.” Or, “My role in this conversation is going to be as an observer. I trust you to have this discussion without me.”
- Be explicit. Model what building on someone’s idea sounds like, or how to respectfully disagree. Get students to practice this regularly.
- Start small. Paired conversations, simple sentence starters, or turn and talk opportunities can help to ease students in.
- Use contexts that encourage this type of dialogue. Circles, with their lack of positional power and their inclusive structure, naturally encourage students to talk with each other.
- Consider your default responses. Instead of confirming or correcting, try questions like, “Who can add to that? Who has a different perspective? Who can help make that clearer?”
Students won’t always get it right. There will be silences, awkwardness, maybe even some frustration (yours and theirs!). But every time we step out of the gatekeeper role, we give student the chance to build the skills we know they’ll need beyond the classroom. The skills to listen, to share, and to genuinely connect with others in a way they deserve.
Check out other articles Kirsty has written here.